Press 1 If You're Not a Dinosaur

I called NewEgg today to resolve an order issue. As I’m navigating their phone maze they issue the imperative: “If you’re calling from a touch tone phone, please press 1”. I think what would be more appropriate would be to say: “If you’re not calling from a touch tone phone, please grunt into the receiver.” Perhaps even “If you’re not calling from a touch tone phone, please send a miniature pterodactyl to us with your message.”

Does anyone not have a touch tone phone anymore? Where are they getting orders, from, Guatemala? I’m old enough and from a backward enough place that I remember rotary phones and slow mechanical phone switches. That place has long since been touch tone. I’m thinking at this point not having a touch tone phone is equivalent to not having opposable thumbs.

Furthermore, how in the world can someone not have a touch tone phone but still need to order computer components?