Monday, January 13, 2020

The Tool Concert: A Synopsis

Drummer: <Bonk uh dunk
Bonk uh dunk
Bonk uh dunk tsh
Bonk uh dunk
Bonk uh dunk
Bonk uh dunk tsh>

Lead Guitar: <Grong gugga gug
Gug grong gugga gug
Gug grong gugga gug>

Bass Guitar: <Do doon doon do>
(no one knows what a bassist is doing)

Singer: I can't express the pain of being intellectually superior to everyone

Background Visuals: <Terence McKenna and David Cronenberg are fighting for control of the Winamp visualization plugins>

My conclusion: Tool is an alternate reality version of Phish where they dedicated themselves to rebelling against yuppies and neocons.


In all seriousness though, it was a really great show, and I'm not really a Tool fan. For the songs I was familiar with they were exactly as you hear on the radio; Rush level precision.

The opening act was awful and I won't dignify the name. Tool played a two and a half hour set which included a fifteen minute intermission. Also, I've never seen a crowd so engaged.

I was surprised by how much I liked the show. Not my favorite style of music but they really did earn my respect. 

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